When half the people were celebrating Easter with their families (which is what I should have been doing too), the other half escaped the city for a 3 days week-end away. On my side I had an important engagement to attend: a Bachelorette Party in Ibiza.
This occasion was welcomed as it allowed me to fly away from Paris’ cold and grey weather, to party with 11 other girls in one of the capitals of “fiesta”, and to create unforgettable moments with a great friend that is getting married in exactly a month.
The Challenge
For me it was clearly a challenge to spend 3 days following an organised program with 10 girls I barely or did not know at all (I am not even mentioning the absence of alone time for 72 hours). I got better with time, but clearly I am not always at ease with large groups of people I don’t know. I am a very cheerful person when surrounded by friend or even colleagues, but not outgoing in this kind of situations. I often even appear as unfriendly or uninterested when I am only listening or assessing my environment, which makes it even harder to connect to people during this kind of events. On a side note, this often goes hand in hand with a syndrome perfectly described by X-Men and True Blood actress Anna Paquin who suffers from a severe case of “Bitchy Resting Face”:
Back to the trip. At first I did not know what to expect from such a destination, I am not a big fan of partying until late morning or traveling in touristic and crowded places.
Going off-season was clearly a good choice. Although the destination attracts many French and Spanish families in the Spring, we never had the feeling to be in the crowded destination people experience in the Summer time in Eivissa (the Spanish name of the island).
The Schedule
The schedule started with a meeting at the airport at 10AM Saturday morning to surprise the bride at the local Starbucks. She obviously knew we were taking her away for the week-end but did not know the destination until the end of the flight, nor who accepted the invitation among her friends.
I guess the best part about a Bachelorette party is seeing the surprise and the emotion in your friend’s eyes. Whatever you do, wherever you go, that is the only thing that counts: the time and the effort that people make for you. You can spend a lot of money or very little, this is a unique moment dedicated to the bride, where for some strange reason she also feels freer than normally and enjoys talking openly about anything and doing things she wouldn’t generally do. The thing I prefer (and dread) is the fact that the bride is NEVER tired during her Bachelorette party. That’s her day and she is probably moved by a mysterious force. That is another proof that someone’s state of mind is what matters the most!
We left a rainy Paris and were welcomed by a sunny Ibiza. Because we were off-season we had a lot of choice for the accommodation and ended in a very friendly hotel which only “issue” was the decoration choice. From my understanding it was an experimental hotel, each room and each floor being decorated in a different style and conveying a different message. Our room was spacious and sunny (all rooms had a balcony) but the first impact with the decoration was certainly “surprising”.
A fake blood stain on the wall was of a dubious taste but we got used to it and enjoyed the breakfasts and the drinks in the patio enough to forget about the aggressive children staring at us in our sleep.
After a 2 hours Flamenco dance lesson which exhausted the team, some shopping for Sunday’s picnic and a short nap, it was 11PM and we were late for the Pacha Ibiza, the world-famous nightclub where the best DJs of the world play each night in summer..
The fact that you can meet people from any nationality or age (I would say from 18 to 60) is the nicest part (the next day we met a group of 50 something French people who recognized us from the bachelorette-flower crowns we had been wearing in the club). Amongst the countless accessories the Pacha is selling everywhere in th island, I admit that I bought the perfect souvenir to complete my yes-I-am-an-old-lady mug collection.
In Benjamin P. Hardy’s post The Secret to Happiness Is 10 Specific Behaviors, rule number 7 explains how doing something that terrifies you every day and getting out of your comfort zone triggers personal growth hence happiness.
“Happy people step out of their comfort zone. You can’t grow if you don’t challenge yourself. And growth is a requirement of happiness. If you’re not growing, you’re slowly decaying and dying.”
That is why after many hesitations I accepted to participate to a Kart Race against the other girls. For the record I am a terrible driver and although I should train with my parents’ car I always refuse because I am scared, hence I do not get better, hence it has been 3 years I have not driven.
So I did the race, with my heart pounding in my chest until the starting signal. And then, once it began, I only felt the thrill of the speed. I finished last but in my defense the results were tight, and although I hate to lose, I was proud of myself. Mostly proud to practice what I write about.
Also I realized how many times in my life, when I have to do or want to do things that scare me to death, I am terribly anxious at the anticipation of the event, and then, once it comes, it is not that bad. Nothing is that bad. Most of the time it turns out to be even extremely funny. But every time I get anxious. One of my many problems is how much time I spend imagining things in my head. Google calls it anxious anticipation. I am the “Hoping for the Best but Expecting the worse” kind of person. Although I know that everything will (probably) be fine, I live every moment in my head, and when the positive outcomes I imagine do not fill me with joy, the negative ones terrify me. The best cure I found is to keep busy as much as possible, forbid my brain to think about it, learn to let go and convince me that I am being stupid (which now I have enough experience to know). This process keeps me out of my thoughts long enough.
After the effort, a nice picnic on San Antonio beach was the perfect activity to relax…
…followed by a nice walk in the sunset.
After a calmer second night in Ibiza we managed to wake up early to visit the old town called Dalt Vila. The name, which means Upper Town, is clearly appropriate and you will need some energy to climb and explore the narrow steep cobbled streets and discover the magnificent views from the breaks in the high ramparts and the vast terraces at each level .
By the time we headed back to the airport I was left with the nice impression of having discovered a famous partying destination with different eyes, and the thought to maybe come back one day in Spring and trek through it to explore the natural beauties and the world heritage sites.